Our interview series Icebreaker features artists talking about things—some strange, some amusing, some meaningful—that just might reveal their true selves. This edition features Héloïse Letissier, the mastermind behind French art-pop project Christine and the Queens, who is currently playing festivals in support of her excellent debut album.
What’s the worst job you’ve ever had?
One I time I had to babysit a kid—and I’m scared of kids. I respect them, but I’m afraid of how honest and unfiltered they are. And this kid actually understood that I was terrified, so he constantly threw things at me until the parents came home. I never got to babysit anyone again.
What is the most embarrassing thing that you’ve ever Googled?
I have Googled so many things related to possible diseases, and it’s always ridiculous. Like: “My toe is hurting, do I have cancer?” “I have a scratch in my eye, am I going to die soon?” “Is eating a soup going to make me die?" Then I end up in forums where I read terrible stories of people who started to have an ache in their knee and then they died.
Who is an artist you love that people would be surprised by given the music that you make?
I have an obsession with Eminem. I read every biography and I saw 8 Mile and I constantly search for him on the internet. His dark side is captivating, and this character of an angry, poor white boy using every social frustration to do something so joyful for everybody to jam on is quite powerful.
What is the worst aspect of modern music culture?
Being a woman. It feels like everything is so much more difficult, and you have to say everything five times instead of once. People just keep on talking about how unattractive I am or how they still don’t think I produced my tracks. Sometimes I still feel like it would be easier if I was a guy.
What’s the best advice anyone has ever given you?
My life started when the [London drag] queens told me, “Don’t care about what people think about you.” It’s quite an easy piece of advice, but a tough one as well. Everyday you remember this and it helps you stop trying to please people.
What is the greatest concert you have ever seen?
The Knife in Paris on the last tour they did before they split up. People were leaving the venue because they were so shocked, but I was loving it so much.
If you could be in any band ever which one would you choose?
Queen. I would just hold the mic for Freddie Mercury.
What are you most vain about?
I’m obsessed with make-up: contouring, products, tutorials. I’m so gifted at it, but I’m not doing it on me because it’s too heavy for my French teenage boy look. You have to be fabulous every second of your life if you’re made up like that, which is probably what Kim [Kardashian] is doing.
Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life?
Louis CK would do a great Christine—I can see him in the tall dress impersonating me. Maybe some work would be involved for the dancing. But I just love his presence. And I think my mind looks like Louis CK.
What is your life motto?
It’s a cynical one: “always look on the bright side of life,” but from Monty Python’s Life of Brian, when Jesus is on the cross.
What is a moment in your life where you felt like a complete idiot?
When I have to take phone calls, I start to sweat and panic. Being on the phone is so weird—hearing a voice without seeing the face so you can’t really know the intention behind the voice.
What fictional character do you relate to most?
Cyrano de Bergerac—a writer sublimating everything who’s convinced that he’s actually a monster.
What is a recent song you’ve heard that made you believe in the power of music?
“Panda” by Desiigner because it does something to my body that’s quite powerful—I have to dance my ass off when I listen to that song.
How would describe yourself as a dancer?
A horny teenage boy.
What is your favorite joke?
It is going to be in French: “Un gar vient dans un café. Plouf!” It’s like a guy that enters a café—which also means a coffee—and then, splash. And now you get why I didn’t have many boyfriends when I was younger.
What is the last TV show that you binge watched?
“Inside Amy Schumer.” I wish I could be in it at some point. I love funny women.
Do you believe in ghosts?
I used to not believe in that, and then I moved in a new house where I constantly hear things and feel cold stuff on my neck. I’m starting to wonder if someone here has unfinished business, so I’m speaking loud so it can actually hear me and manifest itself. That would be awesome, because that would mean that death is not the end, which is something I would love to know. I’m terrified of dying because of everything being too unfinished. I would be happy being a ghost.